What is the secret to Cameron Diaz and Benji Madden’s long-lasting marriage? Therapy.
While talking to her brother-in-law Joel Madden on his Artist Friendly podcast Wednesday, the 52-year-old actress shared that therapy “is a big thing” for them. She means it when she says it’s a “big” part of their relationship, too! Cameron explained:
“It’s what we depend on, so you have that commitment to work on it.”
Wow! According to Cameron, therapy has taught the couple, who have been married for nearly a decade, a lot on how to stop and reflect on what happened, so they don’t keep doing the “same thing over and over again.” She added:
“Why didn’t it work? How can I make it work? What’s my part? What’s the other person’s work? Let’s be self-aware and go into the next attempt a little bit more equipped to hopefully come out with a different outcome.”
However, one person can’t put all effort into the relationship! The Charlie’s Angels alum recognizes that both partners must want to do it and be “100 percent” committed to each other, or it just won’t work:
“It goes back to wanting to do it. You can’t be in a marriage and have a family if … both people are not 100 percent every day. Nobody can be 99 and the other one be 100. Even if you’re mad [at] each other and don’t want to see each other [or] sick of each other it’s still 100 percent commitment to the marriage and to the partnership and getting things in the family. If it’s not 100 percent it just doesn’t work if one person is at a deficit.”
And at the end of the day, Cameron is “most grateful” for her marriage to Benji and the family they’ve created together with their 4-year-old daughter Raddix and 8-month-old son Cardinal, so she’s willing to do everything and anything she can to make it work. The Holiday star expressed:
“It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I was older than [Benji] like the fact that I hadn’t found him before … I was out there a lot longer than he was. You know how much we’ve grown over the last decade together and how much we accomplished. I don’t know how either one of us would have done that without one another.”
They aren’t the only couple to go to therapy in the family, either! Joel admitted he and his wife, Nicole Richie, are big on working with a therapist as well:
“Either resolve something or create a new understanding of a new process together. It’s like going into the gym and learning new moves, building on strength.”
Honestly, we love this! There’s nothing wrong with going to therapy, getting help, and talking it out, so you don’t make the same mistakes again in your marriage!
